Welcome

This blog is my record of my journey with my son who had a rare, and eventually fatal metabolic illness. It is the story of the last year and a half of his life, his death, and after. I have shared this journey this in the hopes that is will not only help me come to terms with the realities, but also that someone along the way may find it helpful, as they face a similar journey.







This is my place to comment on events, blow off steam, encourage myself (and maybe you), share frustrations, show my love, grieve my losses, express my hopes, and if I am lucky, maybe figure out some of this crazy place we call life on earth.





The content might sometimes get a little heavy. As an understatement..







WARNING:







People who are grieving may write sad or difficult things and bring you down. This blog may not be for the faint of stomach or of heart. Read with caution and at your own risk.





If you are new to this blog, I suggest reading it from oldest to newest. It isn't necessary, as what I write is complete in itself. But this blog is sort of the result of the "journey" I'm going on, and I think it sort of "flows" better from oldest to newest.



I do hope that in the end you will find, in spite of all the difficult and heartbreaking things, things that are worth contemplating.





Welcome along!





Monday, February 7, 2011

Under Cover Boss

I just might become the queen of reality TV fans. Yikes. What is happening to me?? I just can't resist finding out all I can about all the different sorts of people on the planet! People fascinate me.

So one of the latest TV "reality" (talk about artistic licence with that term!) shows I have been watching is called "Under Cover Boss." I love this show! Makes me laugh, makes me cry! Hallmark has me under their thumb, I must be their target market!

Anyway, the premise of the show is that a CEO, the "boss" of the company, goes, you guessed it, "undercover" as a new employee in various departments of his/her company. The "boss" finds out what it is really like to work for his/her company and also finds out what his/her employees are REALLY like. There are often shocks and surprises for the boss, and also so many tearjerker moments. No, seriously, I mean it. There are. For some reason the "boss" at least once in every episode seems to meet an employee with a sad story. Is it contrived or real? I don't know. But there you go. That's what I call REAL TV!

Because I LOVE it! Ok, come on, admit it! Who hasn't ever secretly wish EXACTLY THIS thing would happen to you?? You are putting up with some serious garbage in your job, and you just WISH your employer would get a taste of what it is really like. Or you are going above and beyond the call of duty, but you know no one will really notice you for it. You do it because it's right, even though you get nothing out of it. And don't you secretly fantasize that somehow just at that moment your boss would come along and SEE how you are working your butt off with no reward?? Fess up now. You know you have!

And so I love watching these terrific employees who have "no idea" that their boss is the new employee they are training and they are working their butts off. One lady was packaging things SO FAST, she was amazing. The boss, aka the new employee she was training, just couldn't seem to pick up the job, even at the lowest standard. He got FIRED, oops, I mean, LET GO. And the poor lady felt soooo bad, like it was her fault. Little did she know who he really was!

There was a boss who had to SCOOP POOP out of her own resort's pool! Just part of the job. Man, was the guy training her red in the face when he found out who she really was.

There were lots of friendly, hard-working people. Waitresses who could remember tons of orders and do tons of things all at once. People loading trucks with boxes, super fast. Friendly front desk clerks who kept a smile even though they had an injury that caused them pain when they stood for long periods of time.

And then, a "rotten egg" might appear. Someone NOT doing the job they are supposed to do. Caught in the act. Though the boss doesn't let on until later...

Because later on is when the fun REALLY starts! The boss calls the employees into the office for a chat. SURPRISE! And the waitress gets a promotion. And the front desk clerk gets time off with pay for a surgery to repair the injury. There are raises and promotions and improvements in working conditions. Everyone is crying as all the extra hard work they did when they thought no one was watching is rewarded. And of course, I'm crying too. It's beautiful.

The thing is, this reality TV show really does reflect an important reality. All of us really ARE being watch all the time by an "undercover boss." Yup, you guessed it. God. God is the ultimate undercover boss. I don't want anyone to get the wrong idea. I in NO WAY believe that where you go after you die is based on your performance here in life. Yeah, I know, that's really not a very popular way to look at it. But truth isn't a popularity contest for me. I believe what I believe because of the evidence of truth I have seen, not because it sounds good.

I believe that where we go after we die is based solely on whether or not we said yes to Jesus' sacrifice of His life for us or not. It's called forgiveness, and it can't be earned. That's the beauty of it, and also the sticking point, for it hurts the pride to be told we can't earn forgiveness, just repent and accept it.

And though I have accepted a free gift and become adopted into God's family, I am also still in a sense an employee. There are places in the Bible that talk about this. There are "Undercover Boss" stories in the Bible, too.

And when I'm having a bummed out kinda day, it pays to remember this. I don't have a human boss (unless you count Steve!!!) who watches what I do. I don't get a performance review on how I work through grief, or if I give my family my all, or if I remain thankful in adversity. Not here on earth.

But I don't want to be caught slouching, or grumbling or coasting along. My undercover Boss is watching. I want to be one of those people who keep on doing the job they are given with a good attitude and a joyful, thankful spirit. I want to do my best. I want to go the second mile.

Because there will be a day when I am "called into the office" of God. How exciting for me, if I have been a 100% kind of employee. And on that day, the tears of joy can be mine! I want to be the worker who hears "Well done, good and faithful servant!" So when I watch "Undercover Boss" on TV, I remind myself: "Do not be weary while doing good, for in the right season you will reap a harvest if you do not give up." (Gal. 6:9) Yup. For "blessed is that servant whom his master, when he comes, will find so doing." (her job) (Matt 24:45-47)

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