I know I have some friends out there from the States ( like Christina, and Karaleen) who have undergone an embryo adoption in order to have children. But for a long time up here in Canada, it was frowned upon by the powers that be.
What seemed very strange about this to my thinking was that the thinking seemed to be based on fears that one couple would pay another couple to have IVF and then "purchase" the embryos from them. This would indeed be ethically questionable, I agree. The strange thing, to my mind, is that embryos could be donated to science this whole time! No one worried that people would be payed to create embryos to donate to science and no one seemed worried about the ethics of using what IS human and IS alive for scientific purposes.
I am happy to say that things have changed about all this sometime recently. I had looked into embryo adoption (here in Canada, we don't use the word "adoption" we use the word "donation." Please don't be confused if I use both adoption/donation. I have a hard time swallowing that even what the law calls a "potential human life" could be donated!) a while ago, after Joel's diagnosis. Now, again, Steve and I are contemplating how to go about the process of more children.
And a friend did some investigating for me and discovered that there is currently an agency here in Canada that is working on setting up an embryo donation program. The trouble now, is finding the donors. Donors for this program would be people who have ALREADY gone through IVF and had all the children they want, but still have some viable embryos. They may be people faced with an ethical dilemma because they have questions about destroying the embryos, letting them die, or donating them to science. Or they may just be people who have extra embryos and wish to give a kind and generous gift to another family. ( please note that no one is asking anyone to go through IVF for the sole purpose of donation. That is NOT in the parameters of the program. This is just for people who have had IVF done for themselves, and now have extra embryos.)
The caveat here is that the agency that is doing these embryo donations is doing "open" donations, very much like open adoptions and in the spirit of open adoptions, believing that openness and disclosure are best for the children involved. And just like an open adoption, the amount of contact depends on the families involved and the contract they work out together. It also means that if you donate your embryos, you can be sure that they go to a family that you are comfortable with as parents. Oh, and families have to go through the same screening process, complete with home study, as with adoption.
Even if Steve and I did not find ourselves in this situation now, of being carriers for a fatal disorder, I would think this is a great idea. There are so many families out there waiting for children. There are a lot of extra embryos out there. What a gift, to fill someone's empty arms!
I'm going to include the name and contact info for this agency. It is based in Ontario, but works across the country. And I'm going to ask you, my faithful readers, to take this information and spread it around so that people hear about this. If you go to church, mention it there. Maybe your pastor can look up the program, and then make an announcement on Sunday! Mention it to friends or family who have done IVF. Or mention to friends or family who know someone else who have done IVF!
Oh yeah, and if anyone of you, my readers, happen to have some extra embryos, please consider donating them. Steve and I are thinking about going ahead with starting an adoption process for a baby. But we would be very happy to adopt an embryo too! Just saying. :)
Here's the info: Beginnings Family Services. http://www.beginnings.ca/
Embryo adoption/donation is a wonderful thing! If you're looking for families with extra embryos, try www.miracleswaiting.org. It's almost like a classified advertisement for embryos. Keep in mind that they can be shipped frozen from wherever they were created (any country) to your clinic. When finding your own embryos it is important to get a lawyer involved and have a formal agreement drawn up.
ReplyDeleteWe have a semi-open agreement with Genevieve's donor family, where we can communicate through a social worker and contact each other for medical necessity. Genevieve also will have the option of getting to know them when she turns 18. It felt like the right fit for us and I think of the donor family often. What an amazing gift.
I agree with Christina. Just by cooncidence, our embryo adopted baby is also named Genevieve...but we had an anonymous donor give their extra embryos back to our clinic where we underwent IVF to conceive our son a couple years earlier. The unique thing about this is that even though the couple who donated the embryos is unknown to us...they used an egg donor from a service and her profile is completely open to us so we know who she is, all about her and have photos. She is open to Genna contacting her when she is older but we have no relationship with her now at all. So it is kind of tricky.
ReplyDeleteFor us though...embryo adoption has been the most wonderful gift anyone could have ever given us. Genna completes our family so perfectly and we have no doubt she was the child God meant for us to have. I love her just like I love her brother (our biological child) and would not trade her for anything...even another genetically linked child.
I'm so glad Canada is getting on board and making this and option not just for families who desperately want to have a child, but for families who are complete but they have frozen souls suspended in test tubes. Especially for those of us who believe life begins at conception....this is such a great option to get those babies out of the freezer and either a chance at life or a path to heaven. Keep spreading the word Karen...Embryo adoption is still a very small part of ART and the more people know the better the chances more babies will be released from the freezer.
kd